Sunday, November 8, 2015

What is a feminist? Am I a feminist? Are you? Do you care?

Am I a feminist? I always thought so, I have always considered myself a feminist. But recently I am not so sure. 

I guess it depends on your definition of a feminist. 

I don't really like labels. It is to much of a box. Are you liberal, conservative, republican, democrat, blah blah. I don't agree with anybody 100%. 
I am christian, very devout strong christian. Do I agree 100% with every other christian? Not at all. 

I am a woman, 100% through and through female. Do I agree with every other woman out there? Not at all. And that's okay.

So am I a feminist? Does the label or name even matter? Not really, but it just got me to thinking about that fact that I consider myself a feminist but many others wouldn't, I find that interesting. 

I believe in the genius of woman. The glory and splendor of woman. We are amazing, strong, beautiful creatures. We are more than our genitalia and hormones. We can do anything. We can be anything. We are strong and fierce. We are different than men. Not weaker, not less, just different. Our muscle structure, our hormones and our genitalia are all signs of that. 
But that doesn't make us less deserving of adequate pay, the right to vote, the importance of our being, and that we can't do anything we set our minds to...

All woman are glorious, from the so called "butch" to the so called "girly girly" ones. We all make up "woman". I respect those that don't wear skirts ever to those that only wear skirts. Those who stay home and raise their families to those who are devoted to a career or vocation. To those who have chosen the religious life to those who have chosen to be CEOs. From the consecrated virgin to the mother of 13. All women are to be loved and respected. 

Our bodies are not broken or burdensome. Our natural rhythm and cycles are part of us, not something to pump full of hormones and try to suppress. Pregnancy isn't a burden or a disease. It is a beautiful life giving gift. It should be honored and respected. Pregnant women, especially those in crisis, but not just those in crisis, should be offered respect, healthcare, efficient adoption resources, affordable day care, and other options, not abortion. Abortion is a violent intrusive act that hurts women.

We are not just objects for sexual desire. Sex is a natural beautiful act. Our enjoyment of it is a gift. Not something to be traded and used up. It is something to be cherished and honored. 

I, like some, want to feel sexy and pretty. But my self worth shouldn't be tied up in how desirable I can be to men. My self worth is worth more than that. 

I love dance music. l love to dance and get lost in the beat. But some of the songs out there are horrendous to women. We justify, I have justified, and said it's just a song, it's no big deal. That reasoning is lacking in the love and dignity I feel all women deserve. 

We, women, sometimes can be so hard on each other. The pretty one gets shunned, because we think she has it made. I work with a very pretty young lady. She gets hit on all the time. She is friendly and chatty but so many take that as a signal. How hard it must be to deal with that on a daily basis? Or what about the chubby one that gets shamed for her weight. Others judge everything she does, what she eats, how much she sits or walks or whatever. How hard it must be to live with that scrutiny? The skinny one; who has to deal with the questions; "Do you ever eat? Are you anorexic?" Maybe she is just skinny.  
The woman with the down syndrome child has to deal with the whispered, sickening question, "Did you know before she was born?". What a horrible thing to ask a mother about her child. "Why didn't you kill her?" This is what they are really asking. What about that beautiful little girl, looked at like something that shouldn't be here. 

We judge each other based on what we wear. We put out lists of things you shouldn't do at age "whatever". We judge working mothers, stay at home mothers. We judge those that have chosen to be open to life and have lots of children. We judge those who can't or don't have children. The list can go on and on. 

Instead we should be building each other up, supporting one another. And I know many out there do just that. We need to be better at it. We need to practice it every day. To teach our little girls to love and respect themselves and others.

To honor the dignity, genius and beauty that is woman.

I am not sure if this makes me a feminist or not. But I do know that the label doesn't matter.
 
To quote Helen Reddy

"oh yes, I am wise
But it is a wisdom born of pain
yes, I've paid the price
But look how much I've gained
If I have to, I can face anything
I am strong
I am invincible
I am woman"